By Andrew Ripemoff
Big news out of the People’s Republic of Boulder, where the city council had considered a resolution calling for the impeachment of President Bush. Meanwhile, out in the real world, the President is on a tour of Tanzania and Rwanda, where grateful Africans have lined up to applaud him for his HIV relief programs - programs that have saved 1.3 million lives.
If only those rural, uneducated Africans could be brought into line to spew the talking points of Boulder's educated lefties.
But as always, Bush is not the only ex-oilman Republican under attack by hippies under the Flatirons. Education advocate and CU presidential candidate Bruce Benson has come under fire for the unforgivable sin of being a white heterosexual male with money.
You see, even in Boulder, tolerance and diversity have their limits.
The problem is that extreme left-wing partisans can't stand the thought of a Benson presidency, all because of a teeny weeny mistake he made during a press conference, wherein he talked about his desire to: '...bulldoze the CU Office of Multicultural Affairs, and replace it with 50 operating oil wells.'
Of course, I’m just joking. You couldn’t have oil wells on the CU campus. It would completely ruin a tradition of nothing useful ever coming out of Boulder.
Leading the anti-Benson charge was state Rep. Alice Madden, D-Utopia, who, we should point out is in NO WAY related to Fox Sports’ obnoxiously loud broadcaster, John Madden. There are no similarities between the two. After all, one is an annoying, opinionated publicity hound, and the other one is a football announcer.
Univ. of Colorado
After the CU Regents voted to forward Mr. Benson’s candidacy, Rep. Madden gave her reaction to the Boulder Daily Camera: "I thought it was some kind of sick joke."
You see, Rep. Madden is strongly opposed to the Benson presidency. Apparently she is offended by people who give their time and money to education. In fact, Benson has given $8 million of his own money to CU.
And what has Mrs. Madden given to CU? $8 million? $7 million? 75 cents in spare change? Whatever it is, trust me when I say she is very good at hiding her donations from the Google search engine.
Of course, to be fair, Rep. Madden’s heart is in the right place. Her concern about CU’s reputation in the presidential search is legitimate, even if her obsession with CU alum Benson having only one degree is beyond petty. She told the Camera, (in a display of great humility): "Now I’m wishing I’d applied. At least I have a juris doctorate."
Spoken like a simple, down-to-earth, humble liberal lawyer. That framed degree on her wall may make her morally superior to the rest of us, but she’s nice enough not to bring it up all the time. (Thanks Alice!) But does she really believe that intelligence and competence reside only in those individuals possessing a master’s or doctorate?
I mentally go back in time, and imagine her as a delegate to a DNC held years ago:
DNC CHAIRMAN: "All in favor of our presidential candidate, raise your hand."
MADDEN: "Wait a minute. Is this some sort of sick joke? That man can’t be President. He doesn’t even have a juris doctorate like I do."
DNC CHAIRMAN: "You have a point. Ok, all opposed to the nomination of John F. Kennedy for President, please raise your hand..."
So while the search committee, CU Regents, newspapers, prominent Democrats John Hickenlooper, Chris Romer, and Wellington Webb all support Benson, Madden and 12 other bitter legislators ignore the public good and aimlessly wander the streets of Benson-hatred land - a dark, gloomy place where the prevailing mantra is: "Success in the real world prevents you from contributing in the academic one."
After thinly veiled threats of possible CU funding problems under a President Benson, Madden received a torrent of criticism, to which she told The Denver Post:
"I think having an opinion isn’t against the law." So true. And let’s keep that in mind for the next time she goes after Benson--or any candidate for any university position - that happens to hold ideological positions to the Right of the Boulder City Council.